Life/Dating Update :P

It has really been far too long since I wrote a new blog post. So much has happened, so many thoughts in my mind and conversations I have had with myself as I work my way through this thing called life. And, of course, I always want to share them with you. Why? I don't … Continue reading Life/Dating Update 😛

just keep pushing forward :P

When you had an amazing weekend but it's Monday and you gotta go back to reality. :/ Today was rough... Today was a day I let fear overwhelm me. What am I doing? Can I handle it?? Am I really going to be okay? Can I really do this?? 😣 But the answer is yes, … Continue reading just keep pushing forward 😛

Surfing

...kinda crazy...but once I got out there I really didn’t care about the sharks at all. ...the crazy part was that I actually thought it would be cool to see them out there. that part is crazy. But what was cool is that just being out there and going through the waves like that helped me … Continue reading Surfing

Fear of Sharks :/

  Guess who woke up at 5:30 to go surfing :p after staying up all night watching shark attack videos and reading shark attack statistics in California 🤗meeee 🤓 dang I am worried I might have a bigger fear of sharks than I thought 🙄 but at the same time...what’s meant to be will be 🙂 haha and I wanna face my fears always 🙂 annnd … Continue reading Fear of Sharks :/

All of my crying videos ;)

Let’s talk about depression...completely raw and uncensored I want to talk about depression for two reasons...one, because it’s not always what it appears to be...and I LOVVVVE to remind people that as happy as I can be and as many things as I do all of the time...I still fight it every single day. And … Continue reading All of my crying videos 😉

Sit-Skiing For the 2nd Time Since My Accident :)

SitSkiing today for the second time since my accident and the first time in 8 years!!! Snowboarding was by far my favorite thing to do for fun before my accident and I have missed it every winter since!! After my mom first found out about Sit-Skiing, she bought me a lesson for the first Christmas … Continue reading Sit-Skiing For the 2nd Time Since My Accident 🙂

My Road Trip With Derek :)

I met Derek this past December when I went up to Canada for a Wheelchair Basketball Camp. Before I even really knew him, I could tell there was something special about him. Derek just stood out to me because he seemed so happy and chill and it was obvious that he just wanted to learn … Continue reading My Road Trip With Derek 🙂

Good Stress

I am at the coffee shop working on my speech I am going to give to an Elementary School in my hometown tomorrow J   And as I work on it I have had so many emotions going through my head (actually, while I prepare to work on it) 😛     This morning I … Continue reading Good Stress

just some thoughts I had while driving

I remember when I used to think that “someday I will figure it all out and I will know how to just be happy.” I actually thought that it was something that I was doing wrong. I saw adults who seemed to have it all together. They seemed calm and in control and I admired … Continue reading just some thoughts I had while driving

September 2017-Struggling to Keep it together

Something to keep in mind...I have had depression for as long as I can remember...it has nothing to do with the fact that I am in a wheelchair. I think people too often assume that about me when the reality is that the wheelchair only made me stronger. This is what I want to share...just … Continue reading September 2017-Struggling to Keep it together

Feeling in my feet after surgery

...The pain has not been bad at all lately 🙂 Someone asked me today how it can hurt if I can't feel my feet and so I figured I would explain it on here. I can feel pressure on my feet and my nerves can feel like they are on fire at times. I don't … Continue reading Feeling in my feet after surgery

Maybe it’s the meds talking…

I am soooo bored! I don't know if it's the meds...but since I have had nothing to do all day but lay in bed and try and keep myself entertained I have thought a lot 😛 haha and I have just gotta say that I am so incredibly thankful for everything I have been able … Continue reading Maybe it’s the meds talking…

Everything is a blessing in disguise (korny and mooshy…but that’s just me)

Everything is a blessing in disguise. Everything. I know that can be hard to hear for some, and you may want to not even begin to think that way. It may even make you angry to hear someone say that. But if you think about it...is that really how you want to live? If you … Continue reading Everything is a blessing in disguise (korny and mooshy…but that’s just me)

So….I had a seizure…and in the morning I am having an ankle surgery

When I think about the fact that, last Thursday, I had a seizure...it blows my mind. It doesn't even seem real. I truly never thought that would happen to me...but no one ever does. Despite the fact that I feel perfectly fine and I don't really understand what all of it means, I still can't … Continue reading So….I had a seizure…and in the morning I am having an ankle surgery

These past few weeks

These past few weeks have been so up and down. Everything in my life is up and down, there is no in-between. I have always been an all or nothing person...my counselor says that is a problem and that I really need to work on that lol. I just don't really know how to change … Continue reading These past few weeks

I am a strict Sub :/

I have learned over the past week or so...that I am a strict substitute :/ haha like no bs kind of sub. The first episode happened in high school Woodshop last Friday. This kid was being extremely disrespectful. He had his big headphones and hood on and was messing around on his phone and being … Continue reading I am a strict Sub :/

I will never give up

I am never going to give up. No matter how weak I feel. No matter how sad...no matter anything. I will always fight. I will keep pushing forward and I will find that happiness that I am looking for. I will create that happiness. I only need the smallest speck of belief that it is … Continue reading I will never give up

#GAME CHANGERS

I am officially the coach of my Niece's 3rd-5th grade PAA Basketball team 🙂 I am so excited!! Robbie Jamison....it is weird to now be where you were when I was ten! 🙂 I hope to be as good of a coach to these girls as you and your dad were to me! 🙂 ❤ … Continue reading #GAME CHANGERS

I don’t even know what to name this…it is all over the place…

I have been having a lot of anxiety lately. And it sucks. I have been feeling really overwhelmed with myself and all of the things I want to do in my life. I feel like the things I want to do are so big (big to me) that if I really want to do them … Continue reading I don’t even know what to name this…it is all over the place…

5 AM Soccer dream/nightmare

Friday, February 17, 2017 5AM It is 5 Am...and I have to get up in about an hour to get ready to go substitute teach a Kindergarten class. I went to sleep around 1 or 2 am because last night I decided to write a bit in my blog, and then, of course turned the … Continue reading 5 AM Soccer dream/nightmare

Something I started writing a few months ago and never finished because there are too many things I want to say at once.

December, 2016 These past few months have been extremely hard for me. After the Paralympics...I have really struggled. I had just spent the last 7 years of my life working towards this one goal of making it to the Paralympics. And I reached it. And now it's over. For seven years that was my life. … Continue reading Something I started writing a few months ago and never finished because there are too many things I want to say at once.

Ankle Surgery

I have not had any results from the botox in my toes :/ but I did have another appointment today with a foot and ankle specialist at the UW Medicine in Seattle, and I have another appointment with the surgeon tomorrow. If all goes well, I should be having the surgery in the next couple … Continue reading Ankle Surgery

life is…

Today started out a little rough...still trying to figure out what I am going to do now that my roommate and I have been wrongfully kicked out of our apartment with only 15 days to figure it out and move...and waiting to hear back from the internship that I am really hoping I get. But … Continue reading life is…

My First Blog Post on Here

July 25th, 2016 I have depression…I will probably always have depression. But I am also a very positive, outgoing and happy person. Sometimes I feel like a prisoner in my own body…I find myself thinking about how unfair it is that I have to suffer in so much pain…when the depression hits me…I feel like … Continue reading My First Blog Post on Here

The many blessings of my new chair

November 20th, 2015 We beat Alabama this morning, 50-44 🙂 ...and lost our second game, 69-44 to the Lady Milwaukee Bucks team. I didn't exactly play all that well...but tomorrow is a new day. We have two more games and I have two more opportunities to play better. But playing bad was all mental...because my … Continue reading The many blessings of my new chair

Just reminding myself why

February 22, 2015 I got back from the training camp yesterday...it went okay. I let things get in my head...like the fear that I may not make the final cut...and I did not play all that well. It caused me to feel pretty down on myself and have to find a way to get out … Continue reading Just reminding myself why

…I just wanted to be a little more honest and share a little more about my life…

August 26, 2014  I am just making this short and sweet For as long as I can remember I have had pretty bad depression...that only seemed to get worse as more things continued to hurt me in my life I always struggled to believe in myself and thus had a hard time playing the sports … Continue reading …I just wanted to be a little more honest and share a little more about my life…

Getting Stronger

Getting Stronger August 17, 2014 at 5:34am Sooo lately it has been kind of hard for me...I have been getting kind of down about the whole wheelchair thing. I know I shouldn’t...but it is just real life that I do.  That doesn’t mean that I would take this accident back for anything, because I truly … Continue reading Getting Stronger

Understanding their misunderstandings ;)

June 29th, 2014 Soooo as my teammate and I were rushing off the plane and pushing our basketball chairs as fast as we could trying to catch an earlier bus back to campus this older guy stops walking, and after staring at me for a bit with this Debbie-downer kind of look on his face, … Continue reading Understanding their misunderstandings 😉

The only person you have in this world is yourself

May 25th, 2014 The only person that you have in this world is yourself. You have to be able to pick yourself up off the ground even when you feel like there is no way you could ever lift yourself up.  You just have to hold your head up...remind yourself who you are...who you want … Continue reading The only person you have in this world is yourself

Just a Random Writing

January 1, 2014 I’m staying at Chelsea’s on her couch tonight….I have decided to start writing…I am just going to write…even if it doesn’t make any sense or even if it is meaningless. I am just going to write to help myself continue to work through my problems. I was told that writing can be … Continue reading Just a Random Writing

Sincere People <3

Sincere People ❤ January 14, 2014 at 8:54pm I just received an email from one of my Dad's clients and good friend whom has been there from me from the very beginning...I didn't know him when I was in my accident, but he was right by my side and has been there ever since. I … Continue reading Sincere People ❤

One of my favorite memories

December 30th, 2013 The Christmas Party with Kirsten. Today we had our annual Christmas party for kids with disabilities and their families…we each got to choose a kid to buy a present for and I chose to buy one for a girl named Kirsten. I chose her because on her wish list it said that … Continue reading One of my favorite memories

My wheelchair is not what is holding me back

October 9th, 2012 Sometimes I get really confused. I think that maybe I am not doing enough. I wonder where I am going to be in the next five years. Am I holding back? I don't really go out that much. I don't talk on the phone that much. I don't really know what I … Continue reading My wheelchair is not what is holding me back

Then and Now

Then and Now July 16, 2012 at 12:13am I wrote this four years ago and wanted to share it but was scared of what others would think. I didn't want/need others to get the wrong idea and to be worried about me. I always tried my best to appear strong and together but at the … Continue reading Then and Now

Really opening up…and showing my dorky/young/confused self

May 12th, 2012 Plane ride home for the summer So many things have changed in the last year of my life…not to mention the last three years. Things are getting so much better. But I can’t stop. And the struggles will never end. But the challenge is good. I just need to never stop striving … Continue reading Really opening up…and showing my dorky/young/confused self

No idea what I am saying…

Monday, February 27th, 2012 3:28pm WOW life is weird. I think that things are really starting to come together. I am feeling more alive everyday.   The wheelchair almost seems irrelevant to me… I have began to finally question why I am so hard on myself all of the time. It really is a little … Continue reading No idea what I am saying…

Relapse

February 12, 2012 Sunday I thought I was okay. I thought I was going to be able to just be me again. I started the antidepressants over a month ago…and I just upped the dose last Monday.   I thought I was seeing things more clearly. But I just lost it again…   …I just … Continue reading Relapse

Taking Anti-Depressants

January 1, 2012 5:50pm I am on my flight back to school in Illinois after winter break. I am going to try writing to hopefully help me in any way it can. I can’t help but feel completely scared out of my mind. I have no idea what I am doing and I have no … Continue reading Taking Anti-Depressants

Climbing Mountains yo

July 10, 2010 If I could somehow remove myself from my body...I would then be set free. I mean, if I could somehow ignore the hardship and block out the pain...just ignore it. And think about the amazingness of it all...and appreciate myself and my successes. More so...if I could just believe in myself. It … Continue reading Climbing Mountains yo

Sadness

June 15, 2009 I want everything…and nothing at the same time. I have never felt as alone as I do right now…and I did yesterday…and the day before… It’s almost as if I am unable to care about anything anymore. I am the same in every way, every moment. Monotonously getting by.   I go … Continue reading Sadness

Some things I went through.

May 3, 2009 Current mood: blessed On July 20th of last summer, I was in a forever life changing motorcycle accident. In the accident I broke four ribs, collapsed my right lung, had a stick go through my knee and a stick go through my ankle, shredded the skin off my right shin, broke my … Continue reading Some things I went through.

Life Changing Moment

September 10th, 2008 Out of everything I went through- my life changing moment happened 2 months after the accident when I finally got to go home for one night, after the 4 weeks in the hospital, one month in the nursing home, and the night before my 3 ½ weeks of rehab back at the … Continue reading Life Changing Moment